I'm happy I no longer need to be happy

I love the paradoxical nature of our existence.

What brought me most value, has no value. I spent most of my life looking, while it was there all along.

To find things, you have to go where they are not. To find happiness, go consciously where there is none. To move forward, just stay. To control, let go. Desire to not desire.

You learn, add layers, complexity. While you need to unlearn.

Happiness

I asked myself. What does happiness mean to you? How does happy you look? What do you need to achieve to be happy? What do you need to lose to be happy? Why do you want to be happy? When will you be happy?

I realised I was chained to an image. An ideal of circumstances and states that lead to a momentary state of positive emotion. You have expectations, needs you must meet, then you can feel the way you wish. But you have a list now. By checking some off, or even all of them, you inevitably add more. The goalpost keeps moving.

Happiness is elusive. And it's a false goal.

I'm happy that I no longer want or need to be happy. By unchaining myself from ideal images, wishes, expectations and needs, by detaching from any illusion that I need something or should have it, I stripped myself down and found something much more valuable. Contentment.

To live a good and meaningful life, being happy is not something I need.

I am finding happiness by not looking anymore for happiness.

Are you happy?

Do you want to be happy?

What does happiness mean to you?

When will you be happy?

Why do you want to be happy?

Why do you need happiness?

Answer these questions by no longer answering them.